If you’ve been following my previous blog posts, you may know I often talk about the challenges we face in life, those issues that are all too common in our society. Today, I want to share a part of my life that caused me a lot of pain: the endless chatter and judgments of others. I’m sure many of you have experienced this too.
I grew up in a family where other people’s opinions were very important. Every word, every comment seemed to matter so much. While caring about what others think isn’t always a bad thing, it can sometimes kill the happiness, smiles, and talents in young people, especially teenagers. For many years—right before I moved to another country,I was obsessed with trying to please others, always worrying about what they thought. But then, I had a realization: We are not responsible for the thoughts, words, or judgments of others. If we truly know ourselves and understand our boundaries, there’s no need to explain or prove anything. Our silence, our actions, and our confidence will set the limits for others.
It’s a fact of life that people often fail to see us for who we really are. This happens everywhere. I learned this at the time when I stayed quiet; people asked why I was so silent. When I spoke up, they said I was being disrespectful. If I shared my thoughts with older people, I was told I was out of line. When I pursued my goals and dreams, they said, “What’s the point? Stay home, learn housework. No matter what I did, I was judged wrongly.
So I want to end our discussion today with a piece of advice for myself and for you: Be at peace with yourself. Don’t let the opinions of others bring you down, because they will never fully understand who you are. When you know yourself, you don’t need the approval or praise of others.